In which I set up my Beyond Earth faction, picking a very specific combination of Sponsor, colonists, spaceship parts and cargo that will in no way meaningfully dictate my strategy later on.
I land on Terra Atlantea, my home away from home. If you like extended gameplay introductions, then boy, is this ever the episode for you!
I meet most of my new planetary neighbours! They’re mostly jerks, and I end up hating almost all of them. Except Samatar. Samatar’s a pal. Also, the start of my ‘running gag’ of getting Explorers killed in dumb, easily preventable ways. I’m sure the Explorers themselves think it’s hilarious.
I build, research, and explore. Well, I say ‘explore’… ‘Needlessly cause more casualties’ rolls off the tongue a little less. Explorers 0, Terra Atlantea 2.
I expand outward, learning to peacefully deal with the aliens as they come. These lessons will serve me well, right up until I decide human-alien peace is for chumps.
Wait, I’m how low on the score board?
The aliens aren’t actually touching me. Why won’t I stop hitting myself? Also, the start of my being entirely too easily entertained by visual unit upgrades.
Seriously, is Samatar a pal or what? I ally with the coolest guy on the planet, just as the aliens decide they’re fed up with me.
I decide human-alien peace is for chumps. The aliens surprise me, first in a bad way, then in a very good way.
I build a Wonder! Sure, it’s a horrible prison slash surveillance system. But listen: I built a Wonder! I also finally make friends with Suzanne, and the Europe-Africa-America Alliance starts taking form.
I sleep on things, awakening full of plans and conclusions I should have reached ages ago. This involves flipping Vadim Kozlov the bird, for some reason.
Yeah! Samatar, Suzanne, and me: the three of us against the world! Surely this friendship will last forever and always.
My civilization starts turning into cool Human Revolution-esque robots. I welcome this development. Not everyone does.
I select and build a Wonder! It goes off without a hitch. I select and build another Wonder! That one…
It turns out I become a short-sighted vindictive jerk when irrationally angry.
The first-ever war comes to Terra Atlantea. It’s the battle between the well-established, powerful old-money faction with lots of friends, and the young upstart bolstered by recent unexpected successes! I, er… I don’t embody the good side of that conflict.
I finally learn how to spy! It’s just a tiny bit too late.
I start the episode short one capital. I end the episode with one worthless city in surplus. Yay?
So apparently, long-form time travel exists in this universe. And I also find concrete evidence of advanced alien civilizations, to boot. This… doesn’t influence anything in any meaningful way?
Everyone changes outfits, yay! Vadim Kozlov demonstrates how little he thinks of my territorial rights, less yay.
Vadim Kozlov demonstrates how much he thinks of my military might. Top dog on campus, oh yeah!
Friend Suzanne leaves me forever. Not-friend Hutama moves into the space she left behind, but not really with the best of intentions.
I bankroll and innovate an entirely new army, just to shove Hutama’s face in his own dumb mistake.
I shove Hutama’s face in his own dumb mistake.
And then, all of a sudden, Vadim Kozlov attempts to win the game. Just as I was attempting to win the game! This injustice cannot stand.
With a little help from an old friend, I make my move on Vadim Kozlov. Will I tear his Exodus Gate down before he gets enough Settlers onto Terra Atlantea?
Vadim’s portal crumbles into radioactive dust just as my own portal whirs to life. But while Vadim’s portal was a benevolent affair, bringing disenfranchised Settlers over to start a new life, mine is… something else altogether.
Resistance is futile.